Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Confused and losing confident.....

I been wondering these while, am I still the Jason Chua I believe to be? I lose faith in relationship, lose interest in my job, has dreams for business chances. But what can I do to be happy? Recently I been accompanying a few friends which has setback in love life, I do experience it as well but Im not as affected as them? People around me says that IM not serious thats why i can recover fast and carry my singlehood easily......

But is that true? I always put in my true feelings, but there are a lot of factors to consider as well, I dun wan to be selfish to people I care and afraid to hurt them or not met to their expectation thats why I do extreme decisions. I starting to doubt my own judgement.....

I don't even have the courage to tell the girl I love about my feelings. I understand what it means by seeing the person u love yet u cant express it......

Just staying by her side is never true, I can stay by her side and give her anything she hope for within my powers, but when a day came that she is with some1 else am I able to accept it???
But staying at her side, seeing her get hurt in R/S, and nothing much I can do to stop her from nights of drowning in alcohol.... Useless is the word to describe me.....

To fight a battle when you know that you have only 10% of winning, will u still fight on? To live with regrets or to die in honour? Hard to make a choice....

Freedom
Jason Chua

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i think you still do love the person that you are talking about. just that you might not have done enough to be able to keep her by your side. if u think u still can give her what she wants, or at least if u know u still want to try your very best to give her what she wants(although you might not be able to do a job that is good enough), u shld try to get her back. trying is always good and always do assure her that you are trying your best to meet her expectations. but be sure that as u give her assurance, you are keeping up with your words and not just talk but no practical and visible actions.

good luck